All moms, but especially stay at home moms, can feel a certain claim over their children. We carried them in our bodies. We nursed them, woke up in the night with them, changed their diapers, all while healing from the bodily trauma that is pregnancy and childbirth.
Even when they are separate from us, this baby that was once inside of us still feels like part of us. It can be hard to let go. It can be hard to hand them off to someone else and walk away, even if that person is your husband, your baby’s father.
If you stay home with your little ones it can be even harder to let them go. All day you care for them, feed them, change them, clean them, play with them. Trusting someone else with those tasks can feel like failing your children, even if you know that person is completely capable. Even if it’s their father!
Even if he doesn’t do things exactly how you do, even if he messes up or doesn’t know which stuffed animal is your child’s favorite, it is so important to trust your husband. These are his kids too! He is learning about parenting through trial and error just like you. He may have less time with your kids because of work, but that is all the more reason to give them quality time together when you can.
You love your husband so much! You love your baby so much! Let them have time together to love each other so much too!
As the primary caregiver, handing your kid off to someone else can feel like passing them to a babysitter. But resist this feeling with your husband! They are just as much that child’s parent as you are! They have just as much love and care for that little one as you do. They may not be as experienced in taking care of them are you are, but that’s ok!
It’s ok to trust and let go. Isn’t that the point of parenting after all? We don’t want to raise adults that are so dependent on us; we want to raise strong and independent adults. And that involves always learning how to let go.
So remember, dad isn’t babysitting, he’s parenting, just like you.